Jas Jokes = Dad Jokes

Jason has a great sense of humor. It's one of the things that I love the most about him. He is able to laugh at himself, and make light of almost any situation. His own jokes are very unique. Many of them are of the "pull my finger" variety. I have heard them all a million times, and while every new suspect is in a fit of laughter, I am usually rolling my eyes in the corner, smiling saying, "Oh Jas..." Still, he has a great sense of wit and he makes me laugh.

Molly and I have always classified his jokes as "Jas Jokes" as a way to define what is so uniquely something Jas would say to make you laugh. However, my friend Jane recently confessed that she and our friend Adam say that one reason they believe Jason will be a great dad, is that all of his jokes are dad jokes. I loved it!

Jane's favorite example of this is a story I shared with her from a time that Jason and I were on vacation at the beach. We were walking along, and we passed a little girl whose parents were just a few steps behind her. She was stopped on the beach looking down, and as we passed her she looked at us and proudly identified for us, "That's a jellyfish!!" I smiled at her and said, "That's right!" But Jas, ever the quick thinking witty one said to her, "If that's a jellyfish, then where is the peanut butter fish?!" She thought about it for a split second and then burst into laughter all the time looking at Jas with the most adoring eyes like he was the funniest person she'd ever met. "There's no peanut butter fish!" she giggled.

Last weekend Jason and I asked my brother, Jake, for do us a huge favor and drop our dog off at the kennel. We had to leave to be out of town before the kennel opened, so Jake dropped off his "niece" (his words) for us. To thank him, Jason bought him a 6 pack of Heineken. We left it out on the counter with Norah's leash and food to be taken to the kennel with her. I left a note for Jake that said, "Thanks again, Jakers. The beer is yours." But Jason took a much more Jas joke approach. When I walked into the kitchen I saw that Jason had left his own note for Jake. Tucked in the Heineken was a note that said only, "Nice Heiny!!" I had to crack up. Such a Jas joke.

I've said before that Jason will be a great dad. I have absolutely no doubt about this. Perhaps it is that he is a bit of a child himself some days, but most likely its just because he is so fun and loves to joke with people and make them laugh. Whatever you want to call them-Jas jokes or Dad jokes- Jason is sure to have this baby (and occasionally its mommy) giggling through its childhood.

Hot Mama!

That's right; I am one HOT MAMA! Literally.

Due to the increase in my hormone levels (at least that's what "they" say), I am literally SO hot all of the time. Like feverish. Like just played soccer in the summer, hot. Like want to wear shorts in the winter, hot. Like pretty sure I can relate to those ladies a generation ahead of me going through menopause having hot flashes, hot.

The key is dressing in layers. Although, sometimes I get so warm, and I start stripping off so many layers, that I feel like it is downright inappropriate! The other day I was stripped all the way down to my camisole at work. Granted, I wouldn't walk around the office like that, but at my desk, away from people, there I sat: half naked. Our admin walked in to deliver some mail and she said to me, "So you're a hot mama now, huh?" I apologized for my appearance, although she said not to- she has had children herself and understood. Still, I redressed and sweat it out- a little embarrassed.

It is getting colder outside, and as the temperatures drop, and the rest of the world is bundling up more, I am walking around breathing a sigh of relief! Finally, I feel cool! The long john industry is loosing out on my business this year! :) I walked into Barker and Meowsky (a pet store) the other day, and was looking for this particular harness for Norah. This nice guy was helping me. And then the flash hit. So I unzipped my coat. A minute later, I took off my coat. When my brow became wet he gave me a second look. I rolled up my sleeves; didn't work- the nape of my neck was wet and the back of my hair was starting to get wet. By the time I was checking out, I had my blazer off completely, and was standing there in my t-shirt holding the blazer and my jacket, wishing that someone would come in from outside just so the door would open and I could get a whiff of the cool air. It was 30 degrees outside, tops. The guy either thought I was looking for a date, or that I was insane.

Pregnancy is an amazing thing; that is for sure. But it also does really funny things to your body. I'm just along for the ride.

There's nothing like the smell of cigarette smoke in the morning...

... to make a pregnant woman sick!

Seriously, since I have been pregnant my sense of smell is so strong, I am like a bloodhound. I can smell what my neighbors are having for dinner; I can tell you what flowers are in bloom in the park a block away, and don't get me started on my darling dog. :) Did Jason feed Norah? Not a question I have asked for 7 months. I can tell when the container has been opened. So when the smell is right in my face, or seemingly soaking up every air particle I breathe, it turns my over sensory bloodhoundedness (new word!) into a tail spin. The worst of it: cigarette smoke.

On my way to work in the morning, I have to walk by the crowd of smokers outside the building next to mine. It literally must be like the place to been seen if you are a smoker on my block. They are out there in the dozens. And it's like, 9am people! Have you even checked your email yet? When I was in my first trimester (now a distant memory, thank goodness!) the cigarette smoke literally made me sick. After a few times of running to the near by bakery restroom, (or, sadly, closest street garbage can), I decided to chance it no more. I would cross the street before I got to that particular building, and then cross the street again to get back to my building. I have kept this routine up ever since. But recently, construction has started on the sidewalk on that particular safe haven side of the street. You can tell where this is going... back to smokers row for me. So now I hold my breath, bury my head in my jacket, and quicken my step past the clouds of filth. It's embarrassing, but necessary.

A word on perfume/cologne: I enjoy a good scent as much as the next gal, but listen, guy next to me on the el, one spritz is enough. Anything more is just uncalled for. And if I find myself wishing that there was a window to roll down when its 30 degrees outside, it's just plain overkill.

Another thing; Air fresheners, you'd think, by name, are meant to freshen the air. Not so much the case to a pregnant woman. Some of those concoctions that they come up with are just plain foul. Lavender; pleasant. Double pumpkin with honey and cinnamon with a twist of corn; not so much.

I've stopped using my regular soap, I've changed toothpastes and shampoos. All because I can not stand the smell of them. Or pork, or pita chips and hummus, all which I used to love.

Although despite all of this, I held a baby in my arms last week and I couldn't get enough of his smell. If you've ever held a new baby you know exactly what I mean. So, at least we know that once the baby is here I won't have to ask it to please go to another room. That is, until the dirty diapers begin-- and that's when I call on its daddy. ;)

26 1/2 Weeks!

26 1/2 weeks and counting..... and to think, it gets bigger?! Only 3 moths left!

C is for Cookie

The biggest change that pregnancy has brought about in the past few weeks is my appetite. It's insatiable. Although I am doing my best to keep it healthy, I am definitely eating for two.

Those of you who know me well, know that pre-pregnancy there would be days when I would "forget" to eat lunch. We'd be out shopping or something somewhere and my companion would say to me, "Ummmm... can we eat? I'm starving." Then I'd look at my watch and realize it was 2pm. Woops. Gone are those days. Now I'm counting down the minutes until I can tear into my next meal. This baby is definitely growing.

Here is an example:

For breakfast today I ate:
A bowl of Chex cereal
A glass of orange juice

I had a mid-morning snack (yes that's right, and it was totally necessary- don't judge) of:
Yogurt
Hot tea

For lunch I had:
A sandwich
An orange (with 51 seeds in it!! Is that ridiculous or what? There were so many I had to count)
Apple Sauce
Baked Lays
3 cookies (albeit small, but still 3!)

It is now 1pm and I am already wondering what and when I can eat next. That's right. I'm still hungry.

The doctor says I've gained the right amount of weight so far, so I guess I just keep eating?? Still, the non stop hunger is the craziest thing ever. Consider yourself warned: If you see me coming your way; lock up your lunches... I'm on the prowl and I can't be stopped! ;)