Just Haven't Met You Yet!

Awaiting the arrival of a baby is a funny thing. It's like getting ready for a permanent roommate whom you've never met. I'm 30 weeks pregnant, and as much as I love and already feel connected to this little bundle, we don't even know if its a boy or a girl yet. Isn't that crazy? For all intents and purposes, they are a stranger. Still, ask any mother and she'll tell you about the instant overpowering love they felt for their child from the very first second they laid eyes on them. And nothing could be more correct. It's truly one of those things that you have heard every mother you know say a million times, but until you experience it yourself, you can't fully grasp.

I remember vividly the instant love I had for Marin the minute I laid eyes on her. It was like I'd known her all my life. I know for sure that it will be the same with this baby. That from the second he or she is born, we won't be able to believe we ever lived a day without them. But today, we don't know what the baby will look like, or what their temperament will be like, or what they will grow to become. We can't wait to discover all of these things. In the meantime, we're primping and building and washing and buying and dreaming all about a stranger who will be born one day in early May and be in our lives forever.

At least when you are pregnant you have nine months to prepare. When you adopt a baby you are only given a weekend, in some cases. Can you imagine that? Of course, usually the family adopting has waited years up to that point, so I am sure that weekend stretches out for what seems like an eternity. Families are very special, and it doesn't matter how you become one, just that you are one; and that you'll have each other no matter what. My parents used to tell my brother and I that if they could line up all the little boys and all the little girls in the whole world, they'd pick us. I remember that always making me feel special; like even when I was naughty, they still loved me more than anything. I hope that my children always feel the same way. Every night before we went to bed when I was a kid, we thanked God for making us a family. I do the same with Marin today.

I'm feeling well. I have the normal uncomfortableness that you do in your third trimester- I sleep with 3 pillows, move at a snails pace, and seem to have less energy than I should, but that's all normal. I have had really bad heartburn again, like I did with Marin, but a few Tums usually do the trick. I carry those puppies with me everywhere. I think my stomach is growing like it did with Marin- everything is wider- so I guess I still think that the baby is a girl. Not everyone is convinced though, and today I actually found myself wanting to buy a book about trucks. Who knows. That's the best part about not knowing. The fact that I am entering the two-months-to-go mark is 2 parts exhilarating and 1 part terrifying. I can't wait to meet the baby, but I have so much to re-learn. It's amazing how quickly I have forgotten everything that a new mother is supposed to know.

As we wait for our family to grow and to meet this little person who will make us four; as I dream about what color hair they will have, and if they will look like Marin or not. As I wonder about what their name will be, and if they'll like to sing... I am reminded of that Michael Buble song: "I promise you, kid. To give so much more than I get. I just haven't met you yet."